I love online Christmas shopping. Having spent a considerable percentage of my adult years working retail during the holidays, I know how ridiculously brutal shoppers can be this time of year. I prefer to hide in my house and stare at my computer. Better to strain my eyes than my faith in humanity and the spirit of Christmas.

There’s no shortage of things to spend my hard-earned paycheck on. In the future, when I have no shortage of hard-earned paychecks to spend on things, I will buy myself this ring as a salute to my understated and wealthy dorkiness:

The PERCEVAL RING! Also available in Mordred and Lancelot!